Wednesday 19 December 2012

I refuse to be a victim!

So once again a brutal rape has left the country and its capital enraged. There are protest, marches and discussions in the assembly. And as I write this post I receive an e-mail which says, "Sign the petition to tell the President to stop rape NOW!"

Now, I am sure that the honorary President of India has never raped or even thought of doing something like that. So how do I tell him to stop something which he never started in the first place. I have signed many such petitions and to be honest I have never seen any change. A sign will not change the mindset of the rapist because he hasn't been a rapist all his life. It's that one moment of madness that turns him into an animal, at that very moment he forgets all the reason and logic. He forgets that the person in front of him is not just a walking talking vagina but in fact is a human. And if you keep that in mind every man is a potential rapist.

I know I will be called a feminist, a man hater for making this statement but I honestly believe that every man is a potential rapist. Some men have successfully suppressed the ferocious animal in them and some are still trying. Most of them haven't tried at all hence we hear about rapes so often. If you do not believe me try walking on a road full of men, out of 15 12 will stare at you or rather your boobs and at least 5 will walk close to you so that their hand brushes against some part of your body. And these are not uneducated, rowdy men, they are well dressed family guys working in a corporate house, raping you with just their eyes.

So how do we tell them to stop raping us? We sign petitions, hold protests, tweet incessantly about how sad this whole situation is and then we go back to our business as the news die down? No, we won't do the same old bullshit this time. This time we will decide to fight it on our own. We will carry our protection with us in a form of a sharp object. And we'll attack the oppressor where it'll hurt him the most. Yes, I mean physically.

Let's plan a direct attack where every woman protects herself. Let's stop rape. Let's refuse to be a victim!


  1. Being a Delhite with a vagina, I totally identify with you anger and frustration.
    Although, I feel you're contradicting yourself in your piece.
    Case in point: "A sign will not change the mindset of the rapist because he hasn't been a rapist all his life. It's that one moment of madness that turns him into an animal" vs "I honestly believe that every man is a potential rapist."

    Also, I disagree you with you. Rape isn't and never has been about sex. A good number of men who rape are married, have girl-friends or are quite capable of walking up to the nearest red-light area and seek the services of a prostitute.
    Rape is always about power and the need to exert it.
    In the recent case the bus-driver mutilated the victim because she put up a fight and tried to help her friend. Even in wars, rape is used to humiliate a family, community or a woman. It's rarely about sex and only sex.

    As much as I would love to take the matters into my own hands and yell "Let's refuse to be a victim!", we kind of need the government to give a shit, simply because it's impossible to always protect ourselves- the BUS incident is a case in point. And so we will have to do the tried and tested dharnas, candle light vigils, and sign numerous petitions until we can come-up with brighter ideas. Sigh.

    1. Every man is a potential rapist some have been able to tame the monster within some haven't. i agree with your point that rape is not about sex, not always at least. it's both a weapon and a weakness.

      I would love to see Government standing up to protect the women fiercely but it's a long process. And till that happens the onus to protect ourselves is in our hands. That's the need of the hour.

  2. I just realised, it's a more like a post-comment. :P
    Sorry about that, but it's a sensitive topic and it brings out the angry-young-woman in me. :)
    Stay safe and a happy 2013 to you.

    1. Don't be :). This post is a result of the same anger. Thanks for stopping by to comment.
      A safe and happy 2013 to you too.



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